Hello, friends. Is your life just brimming with holiday merriment these days? (And by “merriment,” I mean total and utter chaos.) Mine is. Here’s an example.
This past weekend, my brother-in-law came for a visit, which was awesome. But it’s the first time we’ve had an overnight guest in a while, and our guest room doubles as my office. And the guest room/office was a complete mess that I’ve ignored for too long (confession: YEARS), so I had to spend some time cleaning. It took me a week to clean it, in fact — though I had to clean at night, since I spend my days working and running after a very active toddler. Needless to say, I didn’t get a lot of sleep in the lead-up to the visit. And then, on Saturday, our kiddo came down with a cold.
I went to bed exhausted on Saturday night, but I was woken up at 2am by the kiddo crying for me. “Woken up” is an overstatement; I stumbled out of bed only half-awake and headed in the direction of the crying as quickly as possible. This was a mistake, for several reasons.
- As mentioned, I was only half-awake; I’m not even sure my eyes were open.
- I was moving way too fast.
- So fast, in fact, that I neglected to open our closed bedroom door.
WHAM. My face, particularly my nose, came in full contact with the door, a la Wile E. Coyote after the Road Runner paints a picture of a tunnel on a rock.
While my husband attended to our son (who, it turns out, just needed a tissue), I spent the remainder of the night writhing in pain in the fetal position with an ice pack on my face, moaning “Why does this @#%& happen to me?” and “Do you think I broke my nose?”
Luckily, I didn’t break my nose; I just hope the headaches and bruising clear up by Christmas. As for why this @#%& happens to me, I can only come to one conclusion — that it continues to give me stories to entertain you.
P.S. Speaking of entertaining, on Friday I will be posting a schedule of my upcoming events and appearances to promote The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters: The Jolly Regina. I’ve been brushing up on my pirate talk, so I hope I might see you!
I’m sorry but I did laugh, just a little. I could totally see myself doing the exact same thing.
No need to apologize. It makes the pain worthwhile.
Oh no…hope things get better right now! Merry Christmas. (happy holidays!)
Happy holidays to you, too, Mona!
The severity of the parental injury is inversely related to the size of the child’s need. In severe injury-to-parent cases, the child’s need can almost always be classified as a “need”. Sorry Buuuuud.
Truth. Painful, painful truth.
Can we rearrange your bangs to cover the bruising? 😦
I don’t mean to giggle or make light, but I had a similar thing happen last week; but with stairs and a bruised tailbone!
Laughing is allowed (by others — it’s too painful for me now).